With international mens day around the corner, we figured it would be a good opportunity to raise some awareness on the topic of violence against men. This particular issue is very underreported and in a way hidden away from the media and there are certain reasons causing that to happen. The source of this problem lays in our society’s culture of masculine expectations which makes most men underreport their experiences of violence by women against them. Most male victims of female violence won’t report the incidents to the proper authorities or talk to any friends and family about it, due to taboos, fear of being misunderstood and not be believed, or even ridiculed by them, because of this exact culture mentioned above. Βut why does this happen exactly?

Μale survivors of violence go against social perceptions of the male gender role, due to the stereotype that men are physically and mentally stronger, deeming them according to this mindset, not prone to physical or emotional abuse, and that’s extremely problematic for everybody. It makes men not want to report their abuse, fearing they will be rejected by society and not wanting to face the shame of not being considered “real men”, an incorrect view that has been ingrained in them since childhood, just like the beliefs that “men don’t cry” and that they should always be tough and never show emotions. This is deeply connected to how society views being vocal about ones feelings and emotions, especially negative ones, which is considered a sign of weakness and that couldn’t be further from the truth.

Due to society’s view of men in that way, there’s also a very big gap when it comes to incidents of violence being reported by third party individuals, since studies have shown that incidents against women are a third more likely to be reported to the police in comparison to those against men and that gives us an insight on how violence against men is viewed by the general public. Society should respond to abuse and violence against men the same way as with women and men should be able to speak freely about their abuse (and emotions in general) without society putting them down for it or shaming them into silence. People need to educate themselves on this matter and break the problematic and faulty stereotypes society has put on us, because everyone deserves to speak up without the fear of consequences and to be validated and understood. Every human being deserves a chance to share their experience freely and get the help they need to overcome something that happened to them. Abuse is abuse no matter the gender.